It’s astonishing how quickly one can change how they feel by changing everything. I’ve moved to a different country, live with a different person, am thinking and doing things I haven’t done in a long time, and for the first time in many years, I’ve actually felt happiness, contentment and enjoyment.
It’s still not easy, I still everyday have ups and downs. Battles that must be won, some battles that cannot be won and must be handled with the best way of recovering. I’ve been so active, I haven’t even had time to write a blog for a few days. We played cricket in the nets yesterday afternoon. I haven’t really held a cricket bat in 10 years. Last time I remember was when my dad used to take me to play in the nets at Middle Harbour Public School. It was so much fun, bowling and batting. I was rusty, but still not a bad shot, and Mike is quite a good bowler. There were others there too, who we exchanged conversation with, and they were really nice teenagers / kids. We’ve been walking everyday, gardening, talking, chatting, debating, watching game of thrones. My life has become full of activity and meaning. So quickly it is changing my everyday feelings and attitude it’s uncanny. I’m reading a book called Mindfulness which I may have mentioned before, and that is helping immensely too. I’ve tapered off the valium, taken less seraquel than before, and Mike and I are 100% compatible to live with each other. It was very easy to settle in, and I feel right at home. There are so many things we’ve done already that I’ve enjoyed, and many more things to come, as well as visiting friends and family. So much to do, but the time to do it!
I think what’s most important about this blog, and the significance of it compared to most of my others, is that for basically the first time while writing one of these blogs, I am happy. I am content. I am enjoying my life. I am living.